


Little Petshop of Horrors

by Katharos



Category: Little Shop of Horrors (1986), Petshop of Horrors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-24
Updated: 2009-12-24
Packaged: 2017-10-05 04:13:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/37692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katharos/pseuds/Katharos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The many similarities, not to mention the fact that I keep stumbling over the titles, were practically begging for a crossover. Probably need to have seen both to get all the jokes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Little Petshop of Horrors

Forty years… forty years and the nightmare was visited upon them once again.

The flashbacks had proven too much for poor Audrey and she was passed out on the couch in a dead faint.

Once again, the responsibility for the defence of their lives fell to Seymour.

The creature flopped in his grandson's arms, its forked tail beating a tempo against his thigh. "I don't see what you're getting so worked up for, Grand-pappy Seymour," Seymour 3 said defensively. "You said I could have a pet… I just got him from a pet shop in China Town."

"No!" Seymour shouted frantically. "You do not buy anything that is strange and interesting! You do not buy anything from weird Chinese guys! You do not buy strange and interesting plants from weird Chinese guys!"

"Plants?" Seymour 3 looked briefly puzzled, then indignant. "Coco's not a plant!" He cuddled the strange and interesting animal defensively. It whined and licked its chin.

Seymour flinched back. "Don't let it do that!"

"What? He's just playing."

"Oh, but that's just how it starts! An innocent touch, a comradely pat, and then the next thing you know tentacles are groping you and pulling down your trousers and there's a sadistic dentist trying to do unspeakable things to you in a dentist's chair…" he trailed off into incoherent mumbles

Seymour 3 blinked. "Grand-pappy Seymour?" he asked carefully.

There was a loud knocking at the door. Seymour nearly shot out of his skin. On the coach, Audrey roused enough to let out a high pitched shriek before fainting again.

Coco whimpered and snuggled closer to Seymour 3's chest.

Seymour cringed, turning to stare at the front door. "It's started already then, has it?"

"What's started, Grand-pappy?" Seymour 3 whispered nervously, hugging Coco tighter. He was ignored.

Seymour opened the door the barest crack and peered through it nervously. "Are you offering to make us over night celebrities? We're not interested."

"Grand-pappy!"

The door was shoved the rest of the way open by a tall, blond man who glowered at him.

"Detective Leon Orcott." He displayed his badge briefly.

Seymour clutched at the doorframe to keep himself from collapsing into a heap. They'd found him, they'd finally found him, after all these years, oh Audrey…. "Wh-what can I do for you, Detective?" He managed to stutter out.

The Detective frowned. "I heard someone in this household had purchased a strange and interesting animal from China town this afternoon."

There was a thump as Seymour hit the floor.

 

"… and I don't know what the fuck you think you're up to, but don't think for a second I'm going to let you do it!" Leon finished up his rant with a dark glower at the elegant figure seated opposite him across the table.

D was the picture of offended innocence. "Why, I have no idea why you even think you have grounds for these accusations, Detective. The boy comes from a strained family background. He was in need of companionship."

Leon raised a cynical eyebrow. "Which you provided, huh?"

"Of course," D smiled. "He has only to follow three simple directions in his contract. One," he lifted a finger. "Provide it with a whole fresh lettuce everyday. Two," he raised a second finger. "Keep it at his side always, and three," he raised a third finger. "Don't feed it human blood."

Leon snorted into his tea, ignoring D's restrained wince. "Why would anyone do something as fucking stupid as that?"

"And Detective… We need to talk about this tendency you've picked up for stalking my customers as they leave the shop."

Leon winced guiltily.

D smiled serenely. "It's bad for business."


End file.
